5 Tips For Chronic Pain Patients To Improve Intimacy

The American Academy of Pain Medicine reports that nearly 100 million Americans suffer from chronic pain, which is pain that persists. It can occur after an injury or without apparent damage or previous injury to the body.

Relationship quality is essential for everyone. What if you're in chronic pain? How can you improve relationship quality and intimacy when you're in pain?

1. Find ways to connect with your partner that do not involve sex.
Cuddling, holding hands, and taking warm showers are great ways to increase intimacy in a relationship. They're all activities that can help you feel connected without engaging in sexual activity. When you're in pain, it can be challenging to do things you once could relate to. But finding ways to connect with your partner that don't involve sex can help them understand and appreciate you more. The act of connection comes from physical presence and closeness.

2. Keep talking; communication is vital.
If your partner is not familiar with chronic pain, they will need to understand how your pain affects you emotionally and physically. How will the other person know if you are afraid to fail or scared of the pain related to sexual activity? Make sure to communicate that your partner is not the problem and discuss different positions or locations that may make sex more comfortable and enjoyable.

3. Prioritize sexual intimacy.
Do not get hung up on the myth that sex always has to be spontaneous. It can be planned for in a few ways. One may be picking a "good pain day." If you are less tired or painful at a particular time of the day, communicate this with your partner. This way, they know your best times, and I am sure they would be more than happy to adjust the timing. Fatigue is common in all relationships, but fatigue and a bad pain day can be more challenging. I believe that most problems have a solution or workaround; keep trying.

4. Take your pain medication.
Pain medication is often required, but few who take the medications are often told to try taking the medication after or a few hours before. These medications can cause sexual dysfunction, such as loss of sex drive, performance anxiety, and decreased enjoyment of sex. If needed, speak up to change positions or slow the pace. I also have to mention the pain relief experienced when endorphins are released. We have four neurotransmitters known as "happy hormones." Dopamine, serotonin, endorphins, and oxytocin can all be released through sexual pleasure. Hugs that last 10 seconds longer release oxytocin too. An orgasm before bed can improve your sleep and, when performed frequently, can strengthen the pelvic floor.

5. Get support from a professional.
If you're struggling to manage your pain or find relief from treatments your practitioner prescribes, consider seeking professional advice. A Pain Management Specialist can help identify strategies and treatments that will work best for you and provide guidance on how to use those treatments properly. Plus, they will be familiar with the challenges and unique needs of people with chronic pain. A marriage or sex therapist may also be able to help with solutions to improve your intimacy.

When you have chronic pain, it is essential to take time for yourself. Set time aside for activities that relieve your stress and give you pleasure, relieving some of the tension that comes from living with chronic pain. There are many ways to be intimate without increased pain, so get creative and enjoy each other's company. If you want to explore alternative pain interventions that are not medications, check out this free resource I have put together. 12 Ways To Reduce Pain Without Medications.